God's Knot

"A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should seek Him first to find her."

   Marriage is a divine institution with a purpose.. What God has brought together, let no man destroy. It is mutual love, respect, and devotion between two people. As Christians, we are meant to be attracted to one another and one of the most amazing attainments in our journey is find another christian soul that we can completely bestow ourselves to and raise a family. I was asked recently to lay out my three most important goals as a christian. I answered:


 1. Love as many people as I can, as much as I can and try to put them before myself. I want to be able to love as Jesus loved.
2. I want to help anyone who is less fortunate than me, or anyone who may just need my help. I want to live a life in service of others, not myself.
3. Raise a christian family.


   Anyone who knows me well, knows that I want children more than anything, however, I was told by a doctor that it will be difficult for me to have my own children. I was absolutely devastated when this news was broken to me. I prayed persistently and finally made an agreement with God. I prayed that if He gave me my own children, I would do everything in my power to show them His love, power, and compassion. I would make sure that I lived in such a way that I could raise my kids to know Him. I will also make sure that when I'm ready to "tie the knot" that the man I choose will be just as determined to establish a christian home.
   All of this initiated my thoughts on what a christian wife's responsibilities should be.
God explains His relationship to us is through the metaphor of marriage and so we are, spiritually speaking, God's wives. It is therefore important for us to know what a husband should expect of a wife as well as what a wife should expect of a husband. This knowledge will not only improve our relationship with the Lord but it will clarify what is expected of us in our own marriages. Sometimes I'm afraid that in the name of equality, we have blurred the lines and removed the wonderful distinction between man and woman. We have offered substitutes for the family. After the fall of Adam and Eve, God gave Eve a new role; she was told that her desire shall be for her husband and that her husband would rule over her. I had, at one point in my life, considered not getting married. What would I do then? Must women marry in order to have direction?
   I believe that a man should be the head of his household; a provider and protector. Likewise, I believe a wife should be the care giver both to children and caring for the home. I think both man and woman can also learn from one another as far as spirituality. I also believe both should submit to the other's loving relationship and should work together to maintain the family.
With the fall and its curse came the distortion of woman's proper submissiveness and man's proper authority. As a result, women have a sinful inclination to usurp man's authority, and men have a sinful inclination put women under his feet. This was not part of God's original design for man and woman. So where is the balance? Does a man's authority end in the household, or simply with religion? How much should a wife submit to her husband?